Whether you fear or revere the Roman gods, none can deny that when these deities make an entrance, the whole room stops cold. And no deity exudes a more powerful aura than the one and only Pluto, god of the dead and Lord of the Underworld.
Naturally, no mortal can ever hope to achieve his level of power and charisma. But with a little bit of research—and a whole lot of spending—perhaps you can at least emulate his style.
Looking to make a big impression at the office Halloween party? Or maybe you just want to look your best when you finally reunite with that long-lost daughter who somehow managed to escape your dark domain. Pluto’s signature style is perfect for almost any occasion.
Here are the outfits and accessories to keep on your radar, along with a commentary from the big man himself!
Silk Tie (in Red or Black) – $235
“No self-respecting ruler of the Underworld would ever set foot in the mortal world without a formal tie.
“A simple addition to your outfit that communicates a very important message: I have arrived for business, not pleasure.”
Tombstone Gray Button-Down – $151
“Take it from me: your clothes should always complement your complexion. Even if your skin tone has been described as ‘lifeless,’ ‘devoid of color,’ or ‘akin to cold milk.’
“Do not live in shame, my dear child. Fill your wardrobe with pieces that draw attention to your unique traits, not away from them.
“And do not be afraid to step out of your comfort zone. You mortals may not realize this, but my dress shirts come in a wide variety of hues. Everything from black to gray, to silver, to platinum.
“Charcoal. Slate. Pewter. Graphite. Obsidian. Sterling. Chalk. Frost. And when I’m feeling particularly adventurous: carbon.”
Custom-Made Wool Sports Jacket – $628 + 200-2,000 Undead Souls Wailing in Agony
“Ah, wool. Truly one of our finest creations.
“Please know that if you are one of those insulting mortals who produces synthetic and artificial fabrics, I have a very special punishment awaiting you in the Underworld.
“What? What are you shakily pointing your finger at?
“Ha ha, oh, yes: the many faces of the damned that are woven into the fabric of my coat. Not to worry. I can absolutely guarantee that these are all 100% ethically sourced, pure organic souls. No shortcuts here. Even a child can tell the difference between a true spirit in torment and an artificial one. You’re not fooling anyone.
“I understand that the sheer cost and labor associated with weaving this many fallen spirits into a sports jacket are unimaginable to most of you reading this piece. Especially with a fabric as temperamental as this.
“But clearly, the results speak for themselves.
“Literally. If you listen closely, you can hear faint cries of despair. ‘Help meeeee.’ ‘Release me.’ ‘Please let me rest, O Great Lord of Darkness.’
“Ah. Now that’s the sound of pure quality. To me, it’s worth any price.”
Silver Ring Adorned with Opal Chunk of Frozen Mist – Impossible to Recreate
“Some things, however, are completely priceless, such as this ring, which signifies my faithfulness to my one true beloved. A powerful and enduring love. A love worthy of the immense command over the elements that’s required to craft this one-of-a-kind item.
“You may believe that my Stygian iron sword or Helm of Darkness are the symbols of my power. Yet they pale in comparison to this small, simple ring. Without this on my finger, I am completely and utterly lost.
“I become a shadow of myself. Clouded with confusion. So beside myself with sorrow that I could never be blamed for my actions.
“Which is why I am very grateful that I found this ring hidden under my onyx throne after it went missing for a short time in the early 20th century.
“But why even bring that up? Ancient history at this point. A brief ripple in the ocean of eternity.”
Plain Silver Ring – $395
“This second ring has no special significance. I just like the way it looks.”
Mysterious Cursed Emerald – $?
“Oh, that.
“You need not worry yourself about that.
“At least . . . not yet.”
Tunic and Toga of Black Wool, Embroidered with Threads of Gold and Crimson – $2,999.99
“This is what I wear during conflict and strife. When a strong leader needs to remind his subjects who is in control.
“Now, you see, the most interesting aspect of this outfit is that the stripe is actually made from—
Greek Robes and Golden Laurel – 40 Drachma
“What? No! My form is destabilizing—”
“Return my body to me and begone, you infernal and inferior pretender.”
“Hades! Not now! This is my time! Find your own puff piece!”
“I am the true Lord of the Dead. The ultimate quintessence. You are nothing more than a minor aspect of my boundless power.
“So, if anyone should be a style guide, it is clearly me.”
“Your time has come and gone, Hades. The Romans are the future. We are more aligned with the mortals and their thirst for power and domination.
“Besides, they aren’t interested in hearing about your silly leisure clothes.”
“These robes are both comfortable and practical.”
“And not fit for a king! True power is symbolized by a perfectly fitted suit. With a tight, cropped haircut and cleanly-shaven face. Not that you would know anything about that, you sanctimonious layabout.”
“At least I don’t resemble the biggest loser of the 20th century.”
“I do not look like that mortal! If I ever find the person who first drew that comparison, I will personally weave their soul into this coat.
“Undead or not.”
And with that, Pluto slashed his hand across the air and dissolved into shadows . . .
Unfortunately, he left before we could confirm the price of the Oxford shoes laced with the remains of the fallen giant Alcyoneus. Please forgive us. We’re pretty sure he’s not coming back.
But if you want to see more of the Roman god of the Underworld, you can catch him, as well as his demigod daughter Hazel Levesque, in The Heroes of Olympus series by Rick Riordan. Blink and you’ll miss him!